Confidence is something we all want for our kids—the kind that helps them face challenges, believe in themselves, and keep going, even when things get tough. But confidence doesn’t happen overnight. It’s built, one small win at a time, through practice, patience, and love. One of the best ways to nurture that confidence is by helping your child set and achieve simple goals—especially when it comes to important life skills.
Why Building Confidence Matters:
Confidence isn’t just about feeling good—it’s about knowing you can take on new challenges and succeed. When kids experience success, even in small ways, it teaches them they are capable. This can be especially important in areas where they might be struggling, like building friendships outside of the online world.
Here’s How to Get Started:
- Acknowledge Their Current Strengths: For some pre-teens, making friends online through gaming feels easier and safer than making friends face-to-face. It’s important to acknowledge that your child is building social connections, even if they’re virtual. But at the same time, you can guide them toward expanding those skills in real-world settings.
- Set a Realistic Goal: Instead of trying to pull them away from online friends entirely, start small. For example, set a goal to invite one classmate or neighbor to hang out for an afternoon—whether it’s playing a game together or meeting up at a park. The key is to make the transition feel manageable, not overwhelming.
- Celebrate the Effort: If your child tries to reach out to someone, even if they feel nervous, celebrate that step! Say things like, “I know it took a lot of courage to ask, and I’m really proud of you for putting yourself out there.” It’s not about whether the friendship happens immediately; it’s about encouraging them to take the risk.
Example:
Let’s say your pre-teen feels confident connecting with others online through gaming but struggles to make friends at school. Start by acknowledging the connections they’ve made online as a strength—this shows them you value their skills. Then, set a goal to invite a friend from school to hang out. Even if it’s something simple like grabbing a snack together, that’s a huge win!
After they take that step, celebrate the courage it took. You could say, “You’ve been so great at making connections online, and I’m really impressed with how you’re building relationships outside of that, too. How did it feel to hang out in person?” This helps them reflect on their progress and feel proud of the steps they’re taking.
One Simple Tip You Can Try This Week:
Encourage your child to make one small gesture toward building an in-person friendship. Whether it’s asking someone to join them for lunch at school or just saying hi to a new classmate, each small effort builds confidence. Praise their courage, no matter the outcome!
What Happens When You Do This?
Your child will start to believe in their ability to connect with others beyond the screen. As they build confidence in face-to-face interactions, they’ll feel less reliant on technology for socializing and more capable of forming real-world relationships. It’s a gradual process, but each small step makes a big difference.
Building confidence in real-life social skills doesn’t happen overnight, especially if your child feels more comfortable online. But with patience and small, achievable goals, you can help them see their own ability to connect with others in meaningful ways.
For Your Family’s Success,
Sunny
PS: You can use this free guide to help your child align goals.
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